7.    Perceived Unanswered Prayers

 "Hear me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have relieved me in my distress; Have mercy on me, and hear my prayer."

Psalm 4:1 

 It can be very discouraging when a single person has been a Christian for sometime. Especially when they have served faithfully in their local Church, sowed seeds of breakthrough and prayed on the issue of singleness for many years with seemingly no results. Many singles have expressed the pain of wondering whether God has forsaken them or is deaf to their hearts cry for a need of a marital partner. Whilst this may appear to be the case for the single person, it is not the truth because the Bible clearly states that He will never leave us or forsake us. This period of waiting can be very painful. The perceived unanswered prayer may cause the single person to do something outside the will of God (for example, to go out with a unbeliever) in order to alleviate the pain and avoid what they consider to be unnecessary delay. They can enter into scenarios in an attempt to answer their prayers or alleviate the painful period of waiting. God may allow this even though it is not His perfect will, for He has given everyone the power of choice.  

 8.    Following Wrong Advice

 When singles decide to live their lives purely on what family and friends tell them, what they read in magazines, see on television and hear at barber shops or hairdressers' salon without balancing it with God's Word; it is possible for them to easily follow a course of action, which can be detrimental to them. A course of action that is not fully the desire of the heart takes them away from their destiny. This occurs because the person who is advising them firstly does not understand their destiny. Secondly, the adviser does not desire the best for the person they are advising or thirdly the adviser has a vested interest in the single not pursuing the relationship. And finally, perhaps more dangerously, when the advice comes out of a heart of concern and is sincere but sincerely wrong

9.    Fear of the Unknown

 The acronym of FEAR can be translated into meaning False Evidence Appearing Real. It is said by researchers that 90% of what we worry about never actually happens. This being the case, many of us have lost countless hours to expending nervous energy on something that was never going to happen. In other words, precious time has been wasted being fearful about issues, which were outside of our control or were not going to happen. Fear of: not finding a partner, failing in a relationship, not being a perfect wife or husband, intimacy, getting older, rejection are some of the issues that grip the single person.

 "For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind."

2 Timothy 1:7

 When single people are in pain over their single state, they have a choice to either remain in the despair of the negative issues that singles experience or turn the pain into a stepping-stone, which causes them to rise above the negative and walk into a process of being victorious.