Getting over the break up is a rough thing to sort out. These first steps are to help you regain control of a situation where you might initially feel helpless. These steps will also stop additional harm to your relationship by acting on mere emotions and panic. This period is important and you should embrace it without fear of losing your ex in any way.

Don't Panic

Panic leads to desperation, and no one respects desperate people-or wants to be around them. Hey, it's easy to panic once you've lost control of your relationship...we've all been there. You're in unknown territory now instead of the familiar. Just remember to THINK instead of flaking yourself out.

Give yourself space to heal

It's important to accept and even welcome the pain that comes after a break up. You need to let your emotions out and it is recommended to do it alone. It's absolutely normal and healthy to feel this way. You will feel better after a few days of crying and mourning, just make sure you let your emotions out in a safe and healthy way.

Minimize all contact

In fact, it is highly recommended to adhere to the no contact rule. This means no communication with your ex at all. Unfortunately this is easier said than done in 90% of the cases. What you need to be aware of is the more you stay in contact with your ex the more likely they will want to 'remain' this way. This is not where you want to stay, unless you want to be seen as a 'friend' only. Getting over a break up is hard enough without these additional complications.

Let go of any negative emotions

This could be anger towards yourself or anger towards your ex. You need to let go of any bitterness or resentment over anything related to the break up or relationship in order to step forward and move in a new direction. If your aim is getting over the breakup, you will feel a huge weight removed if you truly allow yourself to let go and make peace with yourself.

Get your head on straight

Once you're more settled emotionally, get a notebook and write down what exactly went wrong with the relationship. A good tip is to start writing and continue to write as thoughts come to you. This isn't meant to be read by anyone. Just write everything down and don't hold anything back. Once you're done, you'll be able to see the situation a little clearer without fear of losing your ex.

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