The world seems full of happy people who have had successful relationships with no history of problems. That is wonderful, but it has not been my experience. Even though I am now happily married, this was not always the case. It was a long road to get where I am now, and I want to let you know the secret of how I was able to get my ex back.

That's right, I am actually married to my ex. Although we are now enjoying a wonderful, loving and supportive marriage, that was not always the case. There was a rocky period, and quite a lengthy one, before we finally committed to each other fully and got married.

I would love to tell you that it was as simple as finding out that we really loved each other deep down but I won't lie. It was nowhere near as simple as that. It took time, thought and a certain amount of soul searching before both he and I were ready to fully commit and make it work.

Both he and I made mistakes that are quite common in many relationships. I needed to be around him and did not give him the space he needed. And he felt smothered by it but didn't feel that he could talk to me about it. Women and men often make these mistakes. Both sides may tend to smother and overwhelm their partner and if that partner finds it impossible to talk about how they feel the relationship is going to be a rough one.

Communication was the key to solving our problems. How I was able to get my ex back was by learning how to talk to him about my thoughts and feelings. Once I saw that he was not pushing me away to hurt me, I was able to back off and relax. And that led to my establishing new interests and creating my own life independent of his. Suddenly, when I didn't want to be around him as much, he began to see that he wanted to be around me. And slowly but surely, I was able to get my ex back.

If you are wondering how to be like I was, you need to know that during our time apart, we behaved humanely towards each other. There was no name calling, or at least, minimal amounts of name calling. Normal emotions aside you should try to act in a manner that you can be proud of, and immature name calling and anger really won't let you do that.

During the time when we were apart, we dated other people. But we were careful to realize that the people who we saw during our break ups were not a part of the relationship I had with my partner. Because we were broken up, it was not cheating and it was not permanent or lasting. Now, they are a distant memory.

This is all well and good and you may wonder how successful I was. I was able to get my ex back and now he has been my husband for the last twelve years. I hope that you are as successful and wish you the same level of happiness that I have experienced in the future.