Happy people live in what is.
They do not make up stories about what is or what was.
They do not live in their interpretations of what is-well to the degree that is possible.
I first learned about stories when I was in my early fifties.
Wow! What an eye opener.
I admit that concept took me a some time to swallow and then to adopt as my own reality.
What are stories? You likely heard that events just are.
They have no meaning other than the one we give them.
The meanings we assign to events constitute our stories about the events.
As people relate their stories over and over again (usually to make someone else wrong and themselves right) they forget what actually happened.
They believe their story is the truth.
They live in their stories.
How can you recognize when someone lives in a story rather than in the reality of the event? Actually that is an easy task.
They tell their story over and over.
They seek empathy and sympathy from others.
They want others to say how awful such and such was.
Such people want validation of their hurt feelings.
I bet you can think of someone like that right now.
Some years ago I was attacked and left disabled with a brain injury.
When I could no longer do the mommy stuff for my kids that I always did they thought I stopped loving them.
When they did not support me as I needed at the time I thought they stopped loving me.
The stories we each told ourselves was "S/he stopped loving me.
" The three of us lived in our stories-and in terrible emotional pain-for years.
Then I learned about stories and explained the concept to my kids.
Instantly the story about no longer being loved disappeared for all of us.
The event was an injury that prevented me from performing at my former functioning level.
Period.
The story I told myself left me feeling so bad and so taken for granted-I know those low frequency thoughts (happy thoughts vibrate fast while unhappy thoughts vibrate slowly) delayed my healing in a big way.
Thank goodness I discovered my story so I could dismiss it.
After all-it was pure fiction! I also recognized other stories I told myself that kept me stuck in other areas of my life.
Eliminating stories turns out to be one of the most empowering techniques I know to move into happiness -and stay there.
Get a clue.
If you find yourself telling the same story more than twice, and you feel bad while telling it then you live in your story.
Stop immediately.
Choose to seek the true factual event instead.
You will be glad you did.