Most online dating advice tells you what to do.
How to "turn on" women - emotionally, physically, intellectually, even spiritually.
But let's take a moment and focus on what "not" to do so you don't kill your chances before you even start.
Here are three of the top ways to undermine your online dating success with women: Online Dating Success Killer #1: Compromise Your Leadership This doesn't mean you have to be macho or false.
It means that women generally look for a man who is a leader, if only in his own life.
So look at your profile and see where you can project a sense of authority.
If you are not technically a leader of other people at work or in your community life, how are you a leader in your family? How are you a thought leader? How do you influence people around you? How are you self-directed, following your own star, your own morals or your own art? How are you solid in who you are - and not subservient to others? Show that you are the engine of your life, and not a boxcar being pulled by others.
Online Dating Success Killer #2 Be A Beggar Because of all the gender confusion in the wake of the women's equality movement, men have become more sensitive to women's feelings, which is actually a good thing.
But alertness to a woman's feelings and nurture - good things - are not to be confused with a lack of spine - a bad thing.
Women are tired of men who ask.
Try stating your goal and inviting them rather than asking for a date, for example.
"I'm going to be in your neighborhood on Friday.
I'll be at X Wine Bar at 7 PM.
Why don't you drop by and we'll say hello.
" This has more internal power than "Would you go out with me on Friday, if you're not busy?" Get the difference? Online Dating Success Killer #3 Project Self-Limitation There are subtle ways people show a lack of self-confidence.
These are unsure times, and your solidity is a very valuable and sexy masculine trait when it comes to attracting women online.
When you write your profile, review it and take out any phrases that limit or diminish you.
For example, "I'm kind of happy" is an attraction-killer compared to, "I am a happy man.
" Look out for phrases like "sort of" " and "a little.
" Basically, stand for what you say, and stand fully in it.
Don't diminish your commitment to what you say, because that only indicates that you don't really believe in who you are and what you say.
That's a start.
And by the way - watch your speech in person when you meet women at work, meet women at bars or in your daily life.
See if you can find ways in which you are undercutting your confidence - and hone your life accordingly.
Stand for what you believe in.
And raise the bar, not only for your self, but the women you meet, but for the sake of everybody.