- 1). Start slowly and reconnect incrementally. It will take time and patience to redevelop your relationship with your family. If you haven't spoken with your relatives recently, call them. If you've spoken with them but not seen them, schedule a visit.
- 2). After speaking to them, you will likely find that individual family members will have different reactions to you upon your return. Try to accept that as normal. In his paper "Family Connection and Prisoner Reentry," Dr. Damian J. Martinez says that a recently released inmate can expect to find family members who are "supportive, apathetic, negative, codependent, exceptionally resourceful, or bothered and uninvolved" or some combination thereof. Understand that your re-entry from prison is as much a process for them as it is for you.
- 3). As your conversations with your family's grow longer, be honest, but tactful with them. One of the things most damaged by your incarceration, and one of things that will be most difficult to rebuild, is a sense of trust. After a lengthy incarceration, your family is in some sense getting to know you again. Lying to relatives, even if you feel it is for their own benefit, will likely make them feel more distant from you. Do not feel the need to divulge everything to them--too much frankness can cause them to recoil--but avoid deceit.
- 4). As you are able to, make restitution to those you've hurt by being incarcerated. According to the federal Department of Health and Human Services, women separated from their jailed partners often experience a number of enormous challenges, such as raising a child alone, living on a diminished income, enduring social stigma and isolation, and facing the emotional turmoil that comes with having a loved one locked up. Restitution can include apologizing, providing financial support, and resuming the regular responsibilities of a parent, child or sibling.
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