You’re not going to get three easy steps to do better with social by reading this. I have a thought; perhaps an important one. I know this singular thought has started to change my perspective on this thing we call social.
I’ve read everything I could get my hands on to learn how to use social and how to build an audience. Much of what I’ve read is great advice. For someone like me . . .
Wait. Maybe I should backup and explain “someone like me”. I’m a nerd; a technician; an analytic mind. I see a machine or a process and want to make it work better. I want to fully understand what makes things tick and then figure out a way to make them tick better; faster; easier; whatever. The only thing I enjoy more than solving a juicy problem is showing others the solution.
So, back to what I saw as the problem of social. I don’t have a big audience. I don’t have a huge following. What good are all my solutions if no-one sees them? This brought me to the natural conclusion that I needed to figure out this “social” machine and build an audience.
After weeks of reading and watching everything on how to do social – and even paying for some online courses – I walked away with some amazing tips on everything from writing an engaging headline to how to get likes and twitter followers.
I still found myself frustrated with the whole process. I learned all the parts of the machine; I analyzed how the parts work together; and I had a pretty decent understanding of what fuel to use and when. So, why then did I not see the machine running fast and furious?
Tonight, it occurred to me. In fact, it slapped me square in the face – in seeing the faces of those around me. Walking along the beach – as I do most Sundays – and looking at the social interactions around me it became obvious. Social is not a machine. It’s not something you can tweak to perfection.
Sure, you can learn how to interact with people in a more positive way. Of course, you can figure out how to be better at building relationships. Just like you can go to a therapist to learn about yourself and what causes problems in the relationships you build – you can work at being someone that other people want to interact with.
Notice the focus in my last few statements. It’s not about getting people to like you or follow you. It’s about being a better you. It’s about caring about the people you interact with – not getting them to interact with you. Real relationships are fluid; take work; and a whole lot of caring.
It’s easy to surf Facebook or any other social site and see a stream of words and pictures; never really thinking about the people behind those interactions. I’m sure – like me – you’re someone that really cares about the people in your life. I encourage you – as I will – to remember that this world we’ve built online is simply an extension of who we are and who we want with us.
After reading this to one of my colleagues; her first question was “So, what are you are going to do differently; what’s going to change?” That was a great question, and after listing off a few things I planned on doing differently it really came down to changing my mindset.
Instead of just seeing words on a page; I’m committing to seeing the person behind the words. What might they have been thinking when they shared that? What were they feeling? If I was sitting with them and having a conversation; how might I respond in that moment?
I believe that changing my perspective will result in the actions I desire.
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