Are you completely distraught and dying to get your ex back? Does it seem like you're ex is a completely different man than the one that you fell in love with? Is he treating you poorly and doesn't even have the heart to talk to you about the breakup or the possibility of getting back together? Yes, breakups can be emotionally draining and mentally, very confusing.
It can seem like your ex has a split personality.
At times he might feel sorry for breaking up with you and then at other times he seems angry and almost cruel in his words and comments.
Meanwhile, your affections and love have been rock solid through all of this and your resolve remains constant in your desire to get your ex back.
You might feel like telling your man that he needs psychiatric evaluation due to his mood swings or wish that there was some sort of reset button on him but there are actually secrets to getting him to snap out of it.
There are things that you can do to get him to remember what it was really like to be with you and have him scared to death that he will lose you.
First, if you have tried to stay in contact with your ex since the breakup it might be time to take a bit of a breather and allow the dust to settle before moving forward with any plans to get him back.
Even though you miss him terribly you should try to refrain from contacting him for at least a few days.
Many experts suggest a month or more but the fact is that in a month he might have already moved on and found someone else which brings with it a whole new set of complications.
A few days to a week of silence is enough time for him to cool off and actually begin to miss you.
You might think that he will forget about you or think that you have moved on but it will actually be him that is feeling this way if you stick to the plan and refrain from contacting him.
You see, by contacting him every day you actually appear weak and needy and by refraining from contacting him he will begin to wonder what is going on.
Trust me...
he will begin to wonder.
Spend this time apart from him thinking about what went wrong with your relationship and what is within your power to change.
Also, spend some time working on your confidence.
You must believe in your ability to get your ex back and your worth as a woman.
You need to see yourself as a prize if he is ever going to see you as the one that almost got away when you do get back in touch with him.
It may sound like a bunch of happy horse manure but your outward appearance is a reflection of how you feel on the inside.
Your posture, your mannerisms, your tone of voice and your facial expressions are all a reflection of what you believe about yourself.
Next, if you have been spending a lot of time trying to get your ex back by asking him to talk about the problems that the two of you had in your relationship you are actually doing damage to your chances of getting him back.
While it might sound like sound advice, by focusing on the negative parts of your relationship you are reminding him of why he broke up with you in the first place.
Even mentioning or trying to show him that you might have changed something in your life that was a problem hoping that this will satisfy him and make him come back is not wise.
Nobody wants to talk about problems and rarely does anyone feel much better by spending hours pouring over relationship issues.
When you focus on problems you only find more problems.
So avoid discussions involving any sort of problems or even the possibility of getting back together.
When the time does come to get back in touch with him try to focus on the good things that have been happening in your life.
Maybe even reflect back on some happy memories that you have of your relationship with him and be truly thankful for that time.
By mentioning those memories and maybe some intimate details or moments that you share you can actually plant the seed of love in his heart again.
It may not happen immediately but given a little time and patient nurturing love will flow from his heart again.