There's a lot of debate about whether or not calling an ex boyfriend you want back is a good idea. You may have been looking to friends for advice on this recently. Some will tell you that the only want to get your boyfriend back is to call him up and profess your undying love for him. Other friends may tell you that you'll stand a better chance of getting him back if you contact him with an excuse to talk to him. Perhaps you would say that you're struggling with a work issue and need his opinion or you need his help moving a piece of furniture. These both sound like logical ways to get a man's attention again, don't they? The problem is that they just aren't going to work.

The reason why calling an ex boyfriend isn't a good idea is fairly simple. After a break up emotions are all over the place for both partners. As women we tend to feel things on a deeper level and this causes us to react more emotionally. If you call him up when you're feeling overwrought you are likely going to come across as desperate and unstable. He'll immediately be uncomfortable talking to you and once the call has ended, he'll do everything in his power to avoid you again. You don't want to make this mistake as it complicates the entire process of getting him back.

What you really need to do is avoid calling him altogether. There is so much more value in not calling an ex boyfriend than there is in calling him. You may not realize it right now, but women who act like they don't care after a break up are the ones who are being chased by their ex boyfriend. Playing hard to get has a lot of merit when it comes to trying to win back a man you love.

If you don't call him you may think that he'll forget about you and move on in his life. That's certainly a possibility, but it's a remote one. What is more likely to happen is he'll have trouble focusing on anything but you and the failed relationship. He'll start to see you in a different, much more positive light. When a person isn't around we start to miss those unique qualities they brought to our lives and it makes us yearn to be with them again.

Self confidence, willpower and control are the qualities that are going to draw your ex boyfriend back in again. By not calling him and instead showing him that you're not the emotional mess he thinks you are, you'll be attracting him back. Remember, that often in life and in love, less is more.