Achieving a work/life balance is possible although it is not something that you can achieve by just thinking about it.
You may have heard of the expression that it takes two hands to clap.
Likewise in any relationship it takes all the parties concern to make things work.
The modern family living in an urban environment is very different to the traditional families of yesteryears where the husband goes to work and the wife has the liberty to stay at home and look after the children and maintain the household.
If you are in a situation of being married and both you and your spouse are working you may have to strike a fine balance in your work/life to maintain the harmony of your marriage as well your competency level in your work.
This can become easily disrupted and here are a few tips to sustain a beautiful work/life balance.
Begin everyday with a smile Obviously if you are married the first person you see in the morning is your spouse.
Start your day with a smile and a happy thought.
This might seem too good to be true, but starting the day feeling positive and happy solves many marital woos as well as problems.
Further if you have children you are giving them a very effective lesson in reality as a happy child will view life with more enthusiasm and thus become a successful member of society.
Remember problems will come and go but when the day is over you are coming home to the person you care.
So smile.
Make time no matter what Work is important.
You need the money and you have got deadlines to meet.
But your family can never be a secondary consideration.
Many couples use this as a simple excuse when relationship breaks down.
We have no time together! The question that you need to ask yourself is: what is the one reason that you go to work? If you have a family to feed and provide then that is the reason.
So what's the point of slogging in your work when the reason for going to work is for your family? Ironic isn't it? Make the time.
Look at your schedule carefully so that you can prioritize effectively.
Even if you could spend half an hour quality time this is better than having no time at all.
Consistency and Discipline If you only need two words to strike a balance between work and life these would be 'consistency' and 'discipline'.
Relationship breaks down primarily because there is no consistency in it.
By this I mean that the couples do not value their relationship enough to give constant care and attention to it.
Think of this like watering a plant.
You can't pour too much water just because you are going on a holiday for a week and hope the plant is well hydrated.
The plant will die just as when you give it too little water.
You have to water the plant regularly and consistently.
A relationship is like that plant.
You have to nurture it gently and consistently.
Yes! You have to work but there are moments in a year which you could dedicate to have little celebrations like a birthday, anniversary and festive seasons.
These times can be used effectively to spend with the family and do some serious emotional bonding.
Discipline is the other trait to develop an excellent work/life balance.
When it is time to work, Work! When it is time to rest, Rest! Many organizations are moving away from the false paradigm that putting many hours at work makes you a hard working person.
That maybe so, but it will also make you a depressing person.
Further, when you start spending too much time at work, you are really chasing after the bell.
Datelines will come and go, you have to deliver your service but do it with discipline.
Allocate and prioritize your work effectively.
That is what success at work is all about.
In your relationship as well discipline is important.
That means you have to be discipline with your health and ensure that you are not overeating or under eating, exercise reasonably and connecting emotionally with your family.
When you do not take care of your physical appearance this might also affect the relationship.
Note that your spouse would want to feel proud being with you and vice versa.
'It Can Only Get Better' Mindset Now this might seem a bit far fetch but it is very true.
No matter what happens to us in our life, if we extrude a positive mental attitude, the situation cannot get worse.
Whatever, the trauma, dilemma and challenges that you face will only be temporary, if you learn to take charge of the situation.
In striking a work/life balance, you will have situations when children might fall ill, you might be retrenched, there are many bills to pay.
All these and more may look like burdens that you cannot shoulder.
But think for a second, wouldn't it be better if you go in as a team to try to resolve this? After all the sanctity of marriage is for all times and seasons.
I like to equate this with the lyric of this song called "Lean on Me", and it goes: "sometimes in our life, we got pain, we got sorrow, but if we are wise, we know that there's always tomorrow - lean on me when you're not strong" Take the cue from this song - that is what family is all about.
Ultimately there is only one key to success in striking a work/life balance.
If you want to make it and you really believe that you can then you will make it.
Article contributed by: Daniel Theyagu has been a training consultant for 20 years and has designed and conducted training for more than 200 companies in different industries both locally and internationally.
He runs his own consultancy firm Lateral Solutions Consultancy and is an adjunct trainer with Nanyang Technological University - Centre for Continuing Education and MDIS.
To engage his services he can be contacted via email at: daniel.
lateralsolutions@gmail.
com or visit his webpage at: www.
thinklaterally.
com