Family & Relationships Marriage & Divorce

Understanding Men: Emotional Deposits and Withdrawals

Do you have many friends who are good at understanding men? If you don't hopefully I can help you understand a bit more about us and how our minds operate.
There's this banking concept of deposits and withdrawals that I'd like to apply to a relationship.
I first read about the concept in a book by Stephen R.
Covey, who wrote the classic, "7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
" This concept is pretty simple: if you want to someone to respect you, you have to respect them, right? It comes under a lot of forms.
If you've ever read the Bible, then you might be aware of the saying, "do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
" To get a man's attention, make small emotional deposits into his "account.
" A few examples of things you could deposit is chatting with him on the phone, buying lunch for him (only after you make him promise that he'll buy you lunch in return), etc.
The key to making this work is that your deposits must encourage him to put emotional deposits back in your account.
To get started, just make sure you listen to him.
Pick up little things he says and point it out later.
Before my girlfriend and I started dating, she told me her favourite chocolate bar was the Flake.
The next time I saw her, I got both of us Flakes.
Later, she returned the favour by shouting me lunch.
Even though it wasn't equal in value, it showed that she did want to pay me back.
The longer this give and take goes for, the easier it is to lead into a fully fledged relationship.
This technique works best at the start of a relationship to show that you're into the guy, but it shouldn't stop you from putting it to use if you've known him for a while already.
Make sure you don't put too big a deposit into his account though.
This will devalue the deposit and ultimately do more damage to the relationship in the long-run.
Hopefully you're a little bit better at understanding men now.
So many women think that as soon as they've hooked up with a guy, they don't have to try any more.
They don't realize that the man can just get up and leave at any moment.
Ladies, respect us and we'll respect you.
Simple as that.

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